Professor Interview: Pavel Lagrange

September 2011 Kyrie Adderholt

With the beginning of a new term came a new professor and member of Ravenclaw! Professor Pavel A. Lagrange, aka Kitty Kitty Bang Bang, decided to put his kitty days behind him and answer his true calling as an eagle. I sat down with the new professor for an interview to get his thoughts on his new house and see how he's adjusting.

Kyrie: How do you like Ravenclaw so far?
Pavel: I like it!

K: If you were going to say how much you like it in math terms, what would you say?
P: I like it like the fist time you're shown a math theorem, and you're like sitting at home after the lecture and you think "that was cool!!"

K: What's been your favorite part of Ravenclaw?
P: Getting to eww the eww face [Cassandra Lobiesk] in two channels so I can double the amount of ewws the eww face gets and make her realise she's an eww face in half the time since she's getting twice the amount. OH and banning her from #ravenclaw was pretty cool!

K: What are you most looking forward to in your future as a Ravenclaw?
P: First quiddy game!

K: How has RQT treated you so far? Those captains are quite crazy!
P: They were evil and gave me 0 letter for a term, I think that was payback from me having won 3 SQLs in a row and them both only 2, cause you know they're used to winning the most!

(as a side note, he now as 0 letter for the whole year)

K: Speaking of treatment, there are rumors around HOL that your new DHoH, Cassandra Lobiesk, is a bit of a bully...well, a major bully. Have you seen any evidence of this?
P: She tries to be a bully, but denying her ewwness doesn't really count, it kind of makes me feel sorry for her really. She tries to call me a pirate and name my parrot,.but these are all desperate ways to hide her ewwwnesss, at which she is sadly failing

K: I have to ask, are you a pirate?
P: NO .... now if you'll just acompany me to the end of that plank there ... you can go first....

K: Have you ever been a pirate?
P: Only in FALSE stories and awful made up film reviews!

K: If you aren't a pirate, then why do you have a parrot?!
P: Because parrots are smart and cool pets to have, who do not like crackers as the pirate stories claim.

K: Are you sure Polly-C doesn't like crackers?
P: Who is Polly-C?! -refuses to answer-

K: Our DHoH will be disappointed with that last answer. Instead, can you explain cricket for her in ten words or less?
P: No, I'm afraid not. Anyone who thinks gardening and watering grass could ever be a sport needs way more than ten words to understand anything.

K: And one final question, which I assure you, is essential, do you know how to spell orange?
P: Goat.

Now, to wrap up our interview, a little test! We're going to do word association. I'm going to say 10 Ravenclaw related words or phrases and you have to say the first thing that pops into your head.

K: Cake
P: Infinitely symmetrical shape (assuming it's round)

K: Blue
P: Ravenclaw

K: Merlin
P: Arthur

K: Godfather
P: Those films I've heard of, but never watched.

K: Cassandra Lobiesk
P: E*W^100000

K: Botting
P: Icky

K: Eagle
P: Hunt

K: Jamming
P: Raspberry

K: Dr. Who
P: Who?

K: Nest
P: Bird

Personally, I think our new professor passes the test and is a true eagle now! How long he remains an eagle after Cassandra reads this is another story...